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Hey, what's up everyone, it's auntie sunflower and I know the last one that we just did was a little you know not five minutes I know we've talked about things like self-care and self-worth But today we're gonna talk about another branch to that Which is self-identity

What do I mean by that well, I'm about to tell you so you can think you are many things and we're not gonna get like Whatever but you can think you are many things and I'm gonna tell you whatever version you think of yourself. It's how you're going to respond to yourself

So if you tell yourself You know, I am beautiful and stunning and I am a queen and a badass And that's probably how you're gonna present yourself. But if you tell yourself, yeah, I'm not really good enough. I'm not I'm not this I'm not that then that's how you're gonna present yourself, right? So you have to figure out

What in your body or your brain? is thoughts that you have because you actually think them or Thoughts that somebody else has put into your brain because of trauma or abuse or any of that stuff Now before we continue we are going to give I am going to give you a trigger warning

because this Some things So if you are listening to this and your kids are nearby Maybe send them out of the room or listen to this in your headphones Because this is not a kid's episode. So that is your trigger warning do with it as you will

Okay now What is trauma trauma is caused when you have been abused or brutalized or? things have happened, right and And Trauma comes in a lot of different forms trauma can come in forms of problems with intimacy and

problems with relationships and Not feeling secure in your own body or feeling like you're an imposter in your own body I Am going to say one more time if your kids are in the room, please do not listen to this with your children They don't need to hear it Those are my two trigger warnings you do with it what you will. Okay

Now I'm gonna tell you a little bit about my story Not a lot about my story cuz you know, I try to keep it light, but I'm gonna tell you a little bit about So one last time if your kids are in the room, please do not listen to this with them in the room, okay

I have been in abusive relationships One of which told me I would look better being Essayed And he told me that, you know straight-faced whatever That's about all I'm gonna get into of my story because there's a lot more but I don't need you don't need to know that But if you have been abused or you have been essayed or any form of you know

Violated there is help. You should definitely get therapy You should find a good trauma counselor Trauma therapist, whatever you want to call it And you should definitely do the work. Is the work easy? No, the work sucks

And you're gonna feel like you're going you're getting worse before you get better, but I promise you on the other side Where I am it does get better Some time someday you will find somebody that cherishes your body like it's the most important gift in the world and

When you guys do, you know fun spicy time They're checking in with you to make sure you're okay Like you will find somebody that values your body and you as much as you value your body and yourself Is it gonna be easy in relationships? No because if you've had trauma you sort of sabotage

Relationships because you're afraid of being hurt again But I would encourage you to let when you find that person Like I have that is the most amazing person in the world and loves me unconditionally

When you find that person that loves you that much let them in Let them in you know, talk about your trauma with them let them know These are some of the issues I have here some of the reasons why I have those issues, you know Here's some things I'm afraid of here's why I'm afraid of those things because communication is key, right? Like they can't know if you don't tell them Okay, so be honest with your people when you're struggling or healing

Healing is gonna suck. I hate to tell you but it is it's gonna suck But anyway, just be honest be open and be true to who you are love always Auntie sunflower god bless you